"These muscles are angry."

Words spoken by my chiropractor as she delved deeply into my shoulder tissue, stretching my neck while massaging tender places on the opposite side.

This, after I had taken a deep breath in, lying on my stomach, and let it out slowly, only to have her hands come down powerfully in the middle of my back, releasing an audible, unwitting "HUH!" from my lips.

Why would anyone submit to this treatment?!

Because whatever Dr. Denniston does is for my good. (Anyone see where I'm going with this?)

Most of us don't want God or other people poking and prodding in our lives, especially when it reveals something uncomfortable or downright sinful. Conversations with friends that push back on my bad theology or question my motivations and behaviors are unpleasant. God's Word shining its objective light into the dark recesses of my conscience can illuminate areas of my life that aren't holy. Sometimes it's unpleasant; sometimes it's painful.

But what's the goal of opening ourselves up to the scrutiny and treatment of those we trust? Hopefully our goal is wholeness and health. Nothing short of transformation.

Jesus told the religious leaders of His time: "You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions of men." (Mark 7:8) That could not have been easy to hear, especially because the rebuke was so public. Jesus was exposing the wrong motivation of their hearts: they were all about themselves and not about God. Ouch.

So the reason I seek out the objective truth of God's Word and the authentic conversations of trusted friends is because I want that stuff out of me! I want and need help seeing my personal blind spots, even if it's uncomfortable. Even if it makes me angry and defensive at first. Because in the process of examining truth in the inmost parts (Psalm 51), I move forward in the transformation process of becoming more like Jesus. And in understanding Him more and more.

And as I've discovered in chiropractic care, sometimes things have to get worse before they can get better. Adjusting one area that's out of alignment requires that our whole bodies make the shift and feel the brunt of the change. But there are devastating effects of vertebral subluxation if we allow the misalignment to continue. (Right, Dr. D?)

Lord, open my heart to the unerring truth of your Word, the clear and powerful conviction of your Holy Spirit, and the trusted words of friends who love me like you do. Would you do whatever it takes to align me with your will to reflect your glory to the world around me. Amen.

Thoughts on Paul's example

I'm reading through Philippians and Colossians this summer with some gals on facebook. This week we're reading Philippians 4 and this morning I was struck by the repetition of Paul's bold invitation to follow his example in following Christ. Here, he says it in verse 9:

"Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me - put into practice. And the God of peace will be with you".

In verse 17 of Chapter 3 he said:

"Join with others in following my example, brothers, and take note of those who live according to the pattern we gave you".

What would that look like in the lives of those I've discipled over the years, if they followed my example and put into practice not only what they've learned, received, and heard from me, but also what they've seen? Definitely better some days than others. And Paul was so intentional about having those people in his life, wasn't he? Constantly multiplying himself by investing in younger men to further the kingdom.

Have you been the beneficiary of that kind of relationship? Have you had the blessing of being that example to someone else? It's quite a challenge, but also very satisfying. It requires that we spend a lot of time with God, allowing Him to make us into an example that can be followed. And an example that always points back to Jesus. Lord, let it be so.

Jesus Christ Superstar

So our family and some friends saw a local production of Jesus Christ Superstar last night. Having never seen the production, I had been warned that it might be offensive, and some actually used the word blasphemous. I am publicly admitting today that I am either theatrically ignorant or more religiously tolerant than I thought. Or both.

In bullet points (because it's how I think and see the world) here are my observations:

• No one approaches the subject of Jesus' life without bringing a certain bias, and Andrew Lloyd Weber and Tim Rice are no exception. They are entitled to express their bias with their own creative and brilliant methods.

• The music of the 70's rocked!

• There is no biblical evidence for portraying Mary Magdalene as a woman with a sordid sexual past, but there it was. Again, I refer to my first point: you're the genius in theater - you get to portray the characters any way you like. Weber and Rice were certainly not the first, nor will they be the last to think of Mary as a former whore.

• Dan Brown (author of The DaVinci Code) probably loved this play. The whole Mary/Jesus love connection...I'm just sayin'.

• Jesus and Judas did die the same week. Fascinating premise to chronicle what that last week would have been like between them. (Also wondering how that era produced such high tenors that could melt your face with their singing. Who knew that's what Jesus and Judas had in common?)

• Staging the tongue in cheek numbers (think Herod in a spa and Judas in the all-sequined afterlife) just that way seemed apt in light of how off everyone was in their assessment of Jesus' purpose. Had Jesus jumped down off the cross to appease the crowd's thirst for sensationalism, everyone would have believed; but they would have believed in an incomplete Jesus. Bottom line: He had to die and rise to actually conquer sin and death. It wasn't the show-stopping number everyone anticipated. It was so much more. I miss it too, sometimes. "Prove you're who you say you are", I demand. As if this life is about me.

• I don't believe Jesus told the lepers, the lame, the poor, and the blind to heal themselves, as He did in the play, but I do believe He may have felt tempted to, if we're to believe Hebrews 4:15, which tells us that "we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin."

• The song Jesus sang in the Garden of Gethsemane scene depicts every bit of anguish and desperation that I picture when I read the gospels. Gorgeous lyrics, heartbreaking delivery. What must that night have been like? Did it feel like Jesus was drinking poison to obey? How does that figure in with the description in Hebrews 12 that says Jesus endured the cross "for the joy set before him"? And what would it be like for me to have my mind so focused on an eternal perspective - so consumed with love for my Savior - that joy could be mingled with anguish? I think I've experienced that to some degree in my life at times, but nothing like Jesus.

So I think the 1973 movie might have to move up on my netflix list. Those rockin' disciples and their songs are going to be haunting me for a while.

Weighing In: Mandatory Retirement

It's time for Numbers in my trek through the Bible. For many, it's a book for skimming. And while there's a place for that, I'm noticing some fascinating details in this book of many details this time around.

And instead of my usual researching and pondering to find the answers to my periodic "huh?", I'm going to pose the questions to you, since I'm going to bet you skimmed this part the last time you read the 7th and 8th chapters of the book of Numbers.

Numbers 7 describes each tribe of Israel giving an offering for the newly consecrated Tent of Meeting. This is what each of the 12 tribes brings:

¹² The one who brought his offering on the first day was Nahshon son of Amminadab of the tribe of Judah.

¹³ His offering was one silver plate weighing a hundred and thirty shekels and one silver sprinkling bowl weighing seventy shekels,^[b] both according to the sanctuary shekel, each filled with the finest flour mixed with olive oil as a grain offering; ¹⁴ one gold dish weighing ten shekels, filled with incense; ¹⁵ one young bull, one ram and one male lamb a year old for a burnt offering; ¹⁶ one male goat for a sin offering; ¹⁷ and two oxen, five rams, five male goats and five male lambs a year old to be sacrificed as a fellowship offering. This was the offering of Nahshon son of Amminadab.

Each of the other tribes then brings exactly the same thing as an offering. So, here's my question:

Where did these wandering Jews in the desert get all this gold and silver when they ran for their lives in the middle of the night of Passover?

I think I have the answer to this, which highlights God's attention to detail, but I'll let you weigh in on this. (Get it? Weigh in? Anyway...)

Second "huh?" moment is in chapter 8:

²³ The LORD said to Moses, ²⁴ “This applies to the Levites: Men twenty-five years old or more shall come to take part in the work at the tent of meeting, ²⁵ but at the age of fifty, they must retire from their regular service and work no longer. ²⁶ They may assist their brothers in performing their duties at the tent of meeting, but they themselves must not do the work. This, then, is how you are to assign the responsibilities of the Levites.”

Mandatory retirement age is in the Bible! What? The Levites have to retire from duty on the tabernacle when they turn 50. Why do you suppose that is?

I'm going to be pondering the nature of work, the structure of society, and God's principles for His people as I let this one simmer. And I look forward to your insight, as well.

Evil

A couple of weeks ago I went to see a French film with a friend at the Seattle International Film Festival. It was called The Clink of Ice. The premise was fascinating. A writer named Charles has cancer and lives alone in an isolated house with his housekeeper (and his young Russian lover for a while, but that's incidental). His wife and son have left him and he drinks wine all day long. One day a man comes to the house and introduces himself as his cancer. The movie then follows Charles as his relationship with the incarnation of his cancer evolves and forces him to reevaluate many aspects of his life. It's not pretty.

Eventually, the housekeeper also develops cancer and so the house now has a dynamic of four instead of two. Charles and Louisa (the housekeeper). Charles and his cancer. Louisa and her cancer. And brain cancer with breast cancer.

Why am I telling you all this?

What has stuck with me since I saw the movie were lines that Charles' cancer kept repeating: Evil always wins. Evil will always be here. His message seemed to be that no matter how many regrets you have in life - no matter how much more time you'd like to have to live your dreams and make things right - cancer doesn't care. It is, in fact, one of life's great equalizers.

And last week, as part of my family and I sat in on the trial for my sister-in-law's murderer, I went back to the lines of the movie and wondered: is it true?

Does evil win?

What do we do with the apparent injustice and depravity all around us?

Are we powerless against the forces of evil in this world? It's scary and disgusting out there.

Where is God when tragedy strikes?

I am happy to report that, even through my tears, God's truth penetrated my doubt. The truth of Scripture and the resonant truth of experience. Here are a few examples of what the Bible says about this:

"...the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world." (1 John 4:4)

"It is mine to avenge; I will repay...There is no god besides me. I put to death and I bring to life, I have wounded and I will heal, and no one can deliver out of my hand." (Deuteronomy 32:35, 39)

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." (John 4:27)

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹ Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. ¹² For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. ¹³ Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand." (Ephesians 6:10-13)

"His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption of the world by evil desires." (2 Peter 1:3-4)

"...If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?...For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:31-32, 38-39)

"Hallelujah! Salvation and glory and power belong to our God, for true and just are his judgments." (Revelation 19:1-2)

"...and hope does not disappoint us..." (Romans 5:5)

And there's much, much more. Our God is sovereign and victorious over evil. Read the book of Revelation. He wins, my friends. He wins. Even when the darkness seems profound, He is there, comforting and working out the details of our lives to bring Him glory and make us into the image of Christ.

As for experience, I know that my Redeemer lives because His Spirit is alive and active in me every day. I sense His promptings, His conviction, His inexplicable peace, and His assurance that He will never leave me or forsake me. I am a stronger, more loving person than I am capable of being. He holds me together when I would fall apart on my own. He loves me completely and holds me when I feel utterly alone. He's done it countless times in the past week alone.

Evil most certainly does not win.

Our Lord God Almighty reigns. And He has already won the victory. We just haven't seen all the acts of the play yet.

Yes, evil will always be here with us while we live on this earth. But when we have a relationship with the God of the universe through Jesus, we are more than victorious over the evil. He is our peace. He is our comfort. He is our advocate.

Cancer will never have the last word over an empty grave.

Jesus already beat death and sin.

They just don't know it yet.

Dilemma

Many mornings I'll open my Bible to where I last left off and determine that I will read until God stops me. Sometimes that turns into reading until somebody in the house wakes up. Sometimes it turns into reading until my coffee is cold. And sometimes it turns into reading until my stomach starts growling. I consider all of those things to fall under the category of "until God stops me".

This morning I sat in my customary Bible-reading chair, coffee cup warm and good intentions in hand. I read exactly 4 verses when God really did stop me. This was the passage:

“What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should perish." (Matthew 18:12-14)

At an earlier reading of this passage I had written in the margin: "How can I make God happy as one of the 99?" And my thoughts went immediately to the story of the prodigal son and his older, somewhat cantankerous brother. Read the finale of that story and see if you notice a connection between the two:

“Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’

“The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’

“‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’” (Luke 15:25-32)

I've always related to the older brother in this parable and to the sheep that didn't wander. I don't have a dramatic or scandalous past that evokes gasps and wide eyes as I recount it. (As my mother reads this, she'll be happy to know that.) But as I contemplated how to make God happy as an obedient child who doesn't wander off in wicked escapades, He revealed to me this sobering thought:

I was lost and I still wander.

There was a time when I was outside God's family. When I was, as Colossians and Ephesians describe so clearly, an enemy of God, an object of wrath, alone, without hope or God in the world.

He brought me near through the sacrificial death of Jesus. And that was when God rejoiced over me coming into His family. That's when I came back into the family I was created to be a part of.

Then God reminded me (as He has been trying to teach me this over and over again recently) that I still wander. I still follow the wicked inclinations of my heart by putting myself and my comfort above the needs of others. By leaving the intentional time in God's presence to pursue useless and fruitless activities. By tilling the soil of my soul for seeds of resentment and bitterness and judgment against the people in my life. Oh, I still wander alright. And every time I come back He is happy! Do you know why God is happy when we come back to Him?

Because He wants us near Him!

He created us for profound, intimate, continual, and eternal relationship with Him and it breaks His heart when we stray. So I can make God happy as one of the 99 sheep by staying close to Him. And by investing in the lives of those who are not. That's the beauty of community.

The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever. Or as John Piper says, to glorify God by enjoying Him forever. There is satisfaction and joy for us and God when we are close.

So when I wander and the Holy Spirit convicts me of it, all that's necessary is a repentant heart. Then the forgiveness Jesus purchased for me on the cross propels me back into the arms of the Good Shepherd. Once again, one of the ninety-nine. Close to the Father. As I was meant to be.

Invitations (Excerpt)

Don’t you love getting an invitation? Parties, graduations, weddings, retirements. It’s an honor to be invited somewhere. And it feels good to know that our presence is requested. Someone wants to share an event with us, whether it’s a celebration or a remembrance. But sometimes an invitation has implications beneath the surface and sometimes we bring our own bias. We may wonder who else is invited? What will I wear? Will there be food? What if so-and-so is there? Awkward… But overall, an invitation that comes is usually a pleasant surprise.

Hollywood is known for its glamour and spectacular parties. The Vanity Fair Oscar party is arguably the most coveted invitation of the year, costing the host over one million dollars to put on. The reason for all this hoopla is simple: the harder the party is to get into, the more people will clamor to be invited.

Especially at this time of year, we receive all kinds of invitations: graduations, weddings, retirement, birthday parties. Do you think there’s a difference in being invited to the Vanity Fair Oscar party and Lily’s Strawberry Shortcake 3^rd Birthday party? Um. Yeah. Whether we want to admit it or not, the importance and/or rarity of the event will have great influence on our response. Neighborhood kid birthday party vs. once-in-a-lifetime red carpet event. Hmmm… tough choice, huh?

There are other kinds of invitations in life, too, aren’t there? Isn’t a marriage proposal a kind of invitation – an invitation from a man to a woman to share his name and a life together? A casual invitation to coffee or lunch can mean a lot to a lonely person. Ultimately an invitation is about relationship. Whether the event is to celebrate relationships – like a wedding – or just including people by being together, marking milestones in life is better when it can be shared in the context of relationship.

What kinds of invitations does God proffer in our lives? Here are three examples:

1. Seek Me. Because God places such importance on relationships, one of His primary invitations to His people throughout the Bible is to seek Him. And His promise is that we will find Him. When the Israelites had been disobedient and God allowed the Chaldeans (Babylonians) to take them as exiles and prisoners into a foreign land, He sent this encouraging invitation through the prophet Jeremiah to the confused, distraught people: This is what the LORD says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my gracious promise to bring you back to this place. ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. ¹⁴ I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.” (Jeremiah 29:10-14) He gave the same invitation through the prophet Amos earlier when He said: ⁴ This is what the LORD says to the house of Israel: “Seek me and live; ⁵ do not seek Bethel, 
do not go to Gilgal, do not journey to Beersheba. 
For Gilgal will surely go into exile, and Bethel will be reduced to nothing.” 
⁶ Seek the LORD and live, or he will sweep through the house of Joseph like a fire; it will devour, and Bethel will have no one to quench it. (Amos 5:4-6) In both cases, to two different groups of people, God issues the same invitation that He offers to us: Come and seek me. He wants to be found because He wants to have relationship with us. Jesus also issued this invitation to those who would follow Him when He said: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. (Matthew 7:7-8) It’s a little like a game of hide and seek with a small child who calls out from his hiding place in the closet, “I’m in here!”, making it easy to find Him. That’s our God: He longs to be found and known and He invites us over and over to look for Him so He can have relationship with us.

2. Rest In Me – Jesus offers this invitation in the gospel of Matthew: ²⁸ “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30) Doesn’t that sound nice? Rest for your soul. Who doesn’t get soul weary from time to time? Who doesn’t feel the burden of life when the pressure mounts and the deadlines are looming large? When relationships are tense and we feel inadequate for the tasks ahead of us? Jesus gives us the invitation to come to Him with all of that. To exchange the self-propelled efforts to manage our lives for the total surrender of our wills to His ways. The reason that Jesus’ yoke is easy and His burden is light is b/c He’s already done everything necessary for us to walk in obedience and joy. 2 Peter 1:3-4 says this: ³ His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. ⁴ Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires. In other words, Jesus has done everything necessary for us to live lives as we were created to live them through His obedient, perfect sacrifice on the cross! Our efforts to just improve ourselves instead of allow Him to transform us are what causes so much of our frustrations. Truth be known, many of us are carrying burdens in life that God never asked us to carry and He wants us to give them to Him. Then we can experience “soul rest”.

3. Follow Me – This invitation may be the hardest to swallow – and certainly the hardest to fully accept. ²³And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. ²⁴For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. ²⁵ For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself? ²⁶For whoever is ashamed of me and of my words, of him will the Son of Man be ashamed when he comes in his glory and the glory of the Father and of the holy angels.” (Luke 9:23-26) This invitation seems to be filled with paradoxes. As if an invite to a birthday party came in the mail and said, “if you’d like to keep your coat, then give it away at the door.” But if I'm going to a party and can't trust that I'll remember where my coat is, the best thing to do is to trust it to the person at the coat check so it'll be safe and waiting for me at the end of the night. And the logic of this cross analogy has to do with the ancient tradition of taking up a cross. When a condemned man was going to be crucified under Roman rule in the time of the disciples, he was required to carry the beam of the cross to the place of execution. Jesus and his disciples would have seen this happen and Jesus Himself was going to carry the beam of HIS cross to Golgotha. It symbolizes the fact that we are to consider ourselves dead to our former way of life and should live as if that’s true. We are no longer slaves to sin, but Christ has bought our freedom through His trip to the cross and resurrection, so we live for Him now. (Galatians 2:20 “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”) This invitation refers to a complete transfer of allegiance. I no longer live for myself; I’m to deny myself. That is the natural, carnal urges that used to have power over me. When I let go of my life I receive the life God has for me. The one I was created to live. That’s what He’s inviting us to. As C.S. Lewis says in Mere Christianity, “…mere improvement is not redemption”. Jesus did not die and rise from the grave to make us better versions of our former selves. He died to redeem us from our old life – to buy us back from a life of slavery to sin and death so we could be new creations, becoming more and more like Him in the process of sanctification.

So what kind of invitations have you received from God recently? What are you sensing that He may be inviting you? Is He inviting you to just look for Him to see if He’s real? Is He inviting you to lay down some burdens that have been too much? Or are you receiving a more challenging invitation? My challenge to you is to be still and ask God to reveal the kind of invitation He’s got for you.